Vegan Meatloaf, Sesame Kale & Mashed Cauliflower

S2 E13 | Pete Holmes & Jonathan Kite Get Me To Go Vegan For 45 Minutes | Something's Burning

Pete Holmes and Jonathan Kite pull Bert onto the plant‑based path (briefly): cozy vegan meatloaf, garlicky sesame kale, and creamy mashed cauliflower. All the comfort, none of the cow.

Vegan Meatloaf

Ingredients:

  • Onion
  • Carrots
  • Celery
  • Garlic
  • Chickpeas
  • Breadcrumbs
  • Flaxseed
  • Nutritional yeast
  • Soy sauce
  • Ketchup (plus more for topping)

Steps:

  1. Add chickpeas to a bowl and mash.
  2. Sauté onion, carrots, celery, and garlic in olive oil until softened.
  3. Stir the sautéed vegetables into the mashed chickpeas with breadcrumbs, flaxseed, nutritional yeast, soy sauce, and ketchup; mix to combine.
  4. Press mixture into a loaf pan. Cover with foil and bake 30 minutes.
  5. In a small bowl, mix ketchup and soy sauce for the topping.
  6. Remove foil; spread topping over the loaf and bake 15 minutes more. Rest briefly before slicing.

Sesame Kale

Ingredients:

  • Chopped kale
  • Toasted sesame oil
  • Garlic powder
  • Salt
  • Red pepper flakes
  • Sesame seeds

Steps:

  1. Heat sesame oil in a large pan; add kale and toss.
  2. Season with salt, garlic powder, and red pepper flakes; cook 5–7 minutes until tender.
  3. Remove from heat; sprinkle with sesame seeds and serve.

Mashed Cauliflower

Ingredients:

  • Cauliflower
  • Garlic
  • Almond milk
  • Salt and pepper

Steps:

  1. Roast or bake cauliflower and garlic for 30 minutes (until tender).
  2. Blend cauliflower with almond milk, roasted garlic, salt, and pepper until smooth.
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